Hey, Unfaithful

In a girls' meeting tonight Najeema talked about roses-- how we are like roses made of glass, not the kind that are made of fabric and wire. You can drop a cheap fake rose and bend it all over the place and it'll be fine; you would let a stranger handle it and not really worry about what might happen. But a glass rose is valuable, fragile. It matters what you do with it. Too bad not many of us realize what we are.

Change of gears... The image of the rose reminded me of the Beauty and the Beast story and how I have been fascinated with it since Christmas. I have realized that

• I am the Beast, and


• Jesus visits twice:


1. once as the beautiful stranger, disguised as an old beggar, who introduces me to the poverty of my own soul and makes my ugliness unavoidable


2. again as the beautiful stranger whose arrival is desired and feared, who enters the forbidden room where I keep my wilting hope, who transforms me into something lovely by loving me.

Najeema gave me a glass rose. I put it in the window. It reminds me of how I am loved without cause and (sorry, Robert Frost) that makes ALL the difference.

Lyrics to "Some Will Seek Forgiveness, Others Escape" by Underoath:

I heard a voice through the discord
Of a deluge of passers-by
I saw one gaze frozen in time
Watching me passing by
And I swear I'll know your face in the crowd
And I'll hear your voice so loud
When you're whispering

"Hey, Unfaithful, I will teach you
To be stronger (to be stronger)
Hey, Ungraceful, I will teach you
To forgive one another"

Here's my kiss to betray
Desperate to brush the lips of grace
Do you feel hollow when you think of how I've lied?
Oh, sweet angel of mercy, with your grace like the morning
Wrap your loving arms around me
Oh, sweet angel of mercy, with your grace like the morning
Wrap your loving arms around me

"Hey, Unfaithful, I will teach you
To be stronger (to be stronger)
Hey, Ungraceful, I will teach you
To forgive one another
Hey, Unfaithful, I will teach you
To be stronger (to be stronger)
Hey, Unloving
I will love you
I will love you
I will love you"

And Jesus I'm ready to come (home!)
(Jesus, I'm ready)
I'm ready to come home, home, home, home
I'm ready to come

"Hey, Unfaithful
Hey, Ungraceful
Hey, Unloving
I will love you
Hey, Unloving (hey, Unloving)
I will love you"

Thanksmas

Sick of the mud that was under my nails
Of choking and crawling and getting more scared
Couldn't recall how I'd tunneled to there
Or how it had felt when I'd had enough air

You found me stifled by thinking and wondering
With blood on my hands and dirt in my mouth
Could I ever deserve to live above ground?
But deeper than questions you just called me out

I laid down my head on top of your heart
Your life became mine and the tears began
Breathing and being came easy again
And I saw my wounds in the scars on your hands

You named the stars and you gave me a name
You hold me up now like the lights in the sky
Your goodness is raging like fire in my mind
Your love songs have taught me to rest in the night

My love for you, Love, is an expression of yours
The echo of words that you spoke in my soul
The beauty I have is the mark of your own
These beautiful places are now what I know